Tuesday, October 12, 2010

Firestarter

I try my hardest not to get into altercations with law enforcement. And I have had them. Very weird, bizarre situations that I will leave for another time. Today was not one of my finer adult moments, but the teenager in me is sitting here with a satisfied smirk on her face.

For those of you who don't know, when people with red hair get really mad (and everyone that has ever had red hair DOES get mad), their hair literally bursts into flames. Kind of like Drew Barrymore in Firestarter. Remember how she used to explode into a fire-y fury when she got pissed off? Well I was Drew this morning. Here's the story. I'll summarize when possible. I am sick this morning, I usually drop Rowan off at daycare. Today James drops off Rowan at daycare because I am sick. On his way home he goes straight at an intersection where there is a sign indicating that you cannot drive straight between the hours of 7-9 AM. James drove through it at 8:19 AM. Policeman runs out of bushes nearby and flags him over. Proceeds to give James tickets. One ticket is for having out of date registration. He comes home. He slams the door. Drops tickets on desk in the entryway. Curses as he continues down the hall. I pick up tickets. I read the out of date registration ticket............And all hell breaks lose. This is the part where the red hair takes over, the part where that hot Eric Bana guy starts to scream get out of here before he changes into the incredible hulk.

Suddenly, I don't feel sick anymore. That is the nice thing about adrenaline, although temporary. I slip on a pair of jeans. I grab a hoodie. Screw taking a shower, there is no time. I look in the mirror and take the little piece of parsley or whatever that is stuck in my tooth out, because the hulk has no time to brush his teeth....No, no, no, I need to go find the police officer that gave my husband a ticket that he didn't deserve. You see, I personally renewed that registration less then a month ago, and I will be damned if I am going to get a ticket for something that we don't deserve.

So I drive a few blocks and low and behold I see the police officer in his car. Writing a ticket to a little Asian lady that looks petrified. I wait until he is finished, get out of my car, and walk over to his window. He doesn't look up. The conversation goes something like this.

Me: Can I have a moment of your time?

Him: Make it quick.

Me: You gave my husband a ticket that was not deserved and I would like to discuss it with you.

Him: Technically I am not supposed to discuss that with you.

Me: Ignoring his previous comment, you gave him a ticket for out of date registration, when the registration is up to date.

Him: I told your husband what the problem was...

Me: Well why don't you tell me.

Him: Let me see your permit and your registration.

Me: Hands it over.

Him: You see this sticker? This sticker is supposed to go on the back of this registration card.

Me: OK. So why did you not just tell my husband to stick it on, and call it a day?

Him: Does not respond.

Me: Seriously?

Him: I told your husband all he has to do is come to court and I will drop the charges.

Me: Why don't you rip up the ticket then. This is silly.

Him: Says nothing. Still hasn't looked up at me this whole time.

Me: Thanks for your time.

Him: No problem.

This is the point where I wanted to Drew Barrymore his ass. I wanted my hands to turn into fire ball launchers and set his car on fire. That is what I wanted to do at this point....But since I really can't summon fire on demand, or turn into a big green pissed off monster, I got into my car, drove home, and am sitting here typing this waiting for my red flaming hair to die out. Did I overreact? Maybe....Did I need to drive down and find the man that did my husband wrong....Probably not....Do I feel better that I went down there and told the officer what he did was unjustified and silly. 100%. So, how is YOUR morning going?

2 comments:

jo marks said...

LOL, you described that so well! The policeman couldn't look at you cos he was terrified!!

Michelle Springer said...

Ha ha Jo! He was being a jerk, which was ticking me off even more. He should be scared, my bite is way worse then my bark ;)